By: Larry Mackey, Columnist
I was recently interviewed by the homie and co-writer at Lacrosse is Awesome, Jonny Vegas Namer and we were talking about The Walking Dead. I have some feelings about the show and how I feel that lacrosse could be the answer to the show’s slow moving mindless things that think humans are delicious problem! So…let’s talk about that then.
The problem is on that show and in real life Americans don’t have a weapon to bridge the gap between using your hands and guns. As an example, the Europeans have hundreds of years of swordsmanship between the cave man and the modern royal marine. The natives of our country have a history of close combat weapons but everyone after them from the settlers up have had guns. Problem, gun runs out of ammo now you have to fight, but you can’t because we as Americans are totally ineffective without guns. Thus the slow moving mindless thing, Zombies think humans are delicious and have plenty of food. I don’t know what to do without a gun, panicking, food.
What I see in that show is a lack of a unified fighting system based around a hand weapon. In my humble opinion, lacrosse as a national sport bridges that gap. Again guns are guns, if you have enough of them and ammo you can win! In the situation of that show, people seem to be who you save guns for… The biggest draw back to guns is ammo; if you run out of bullets you got background checked for what in the end was an expensive club! The club wielding (and panicking because he ran out of bullets) American is no match for the slow enemy who’s hungry! So it seems anyway…
In my humble opinion, the lacrosse stick bridges our gap, but it would have to be weaponized. The weaponized Lacrosse stick would look similar to the Egyptian symbol the Onk. It would bridge the gap by being a silent projectile launcher that can be used as a close combat weapon. The lacrosse stick and stones would be the bow and arrow of any conflict against slow moving targets. The biggest advantage to the lacrosse stick would be the endless supply of ammo the creator has stored away for us in the form of stones and rocks! Finding smooth stones that leave the stick like a lacrosse ball would make finding ammo an art all its own. The lacrosse stick also gives you the “anything in a pinch” type cushion you just don’t have with a gun, who’s ammo tend to be very specific to the weapon.
The skills learned in just training to play lacrosse gives you advantages in the scenario of us versus a slow moving enemy. Being able to deliver an accurate shot while running is a basic part of our game which when mastered makes you deadly on the field. Those same skills versus our enemy make you just as deadly. The Onk type attachment on our lacrosse stick would be used in a bayonet type manner for close quarter battle! We would need to train with it like our native brothers taught one another to use a tomahawk. The tomahawk as a close quarter combat weapon was carried by some of our troops overseas. (see Colby Buzzel’s book “My War”) Somebody understands what I’m saying!
As we talked about this I couldn’t help but think about not only David and Goliath but Paul Rabil on ESPN’s sport science show. He hit four of five targets with an eight ounce lacrosse ball and shattered them! My thought was what if that was an eight ounce stone and five slow moving enemies in Part Two of this article I’ll tell you what I’d do with 100 warriors like him in the scenario in which we’ve been speaking. Love, Peace, Lax.
Coach Larry Mackey, Columnist
Lacrosse is Awesome